by Wendy Silvers, CPS Partnership Community
My daughter, Joie-May, who turns 18 in a few weeks, created this wise graphic when she was 8 years old.
Isn’t this insightful?
I just love the simplicity of her illustration and the clarity and declaration of her message!
Whoever said, wisdom is wasted on the young, certainly didn’t spend much time empowering these amazing beings. It is incredible to behold their natural intelligence and authenticity bloom. A child who is loved at the very depth of their being, just for being, grows into a healthy, conscious adult who would not hurt another sentient being. So, I toss that untrue statement above, along with, children should be seen and not heard, into the archaic, patriarchal, trash bin where they belong.
Those points of view represent the old school, dominant, power over paradigm that is slowly crumbling in our society regarding raising and being with children. As a mom’s empowerment coach and nonviolent parenting educator for 15+ years, I help parents, caregivers and teachers transform their own childhood wounds into wisdom. They become aware that statements such as those are completely untrue and disempowering.
What’s true is that children are:
>> Real ..
>> Brilliant ..
>> Funny ..
>> Loving ..
>> Forgiving ..
>> Perceptive ..
>> Receptive ..
>> Intuitive ..
>> Courageous ..
>> Creative ..
To raise a child with intention is one of the most important jobs that exists.
You don’t want to strip them of who they are. You want them to be themselves. You want to bring out their best.
To do that, I recommend to my awakened mother clients who desire a healthy, connected, relationship with their children that they do the following:
- Be their mentor … a clear, loving, steward of their body, mind, and spirit.
- Make the choices necessary to keep them healthy and original thinkers.
- Be the example of what an empowered, awakened Mama is like.
- Lean in more.
- Loosen up — don’t be rigid and exacting.
- Cultivate deep listening skills.
- Don’t be so quick to teach and correct.
- Do not compare your child to another child.
When a child’s needs are understood and met .. when they are respected, acknowledged, and loved up at the very depth of their being for just being, they learn that it is safe and natural to be their authentic self in the world.
Here’s the fine print … when you make a commitment to grow empowered children, you must be able to handle their push back and their wholeness.
How do you do this?
You must be willing to grow with your child.
As Carl Jung said, “Nothing has a stronger influence psychologically on their children than the unlived life of the parent.”
So, you must choose …
To engage in self-reflection.
To be willing to pull the covers off your limiting thoughts, behaviors and conditional love.
To awaken your sovereign, sacred, soul power…
To Be Yourself. Wholeheartedly…
Real … Kind … Authentic … the best You, you can be …
Not anybody else …
It helps children when they see that their mom has wants and needs, get angry, cry, and mourn as well as laugh and celebrate. Allow your children to see that you are okay with feelings. Let them know when you working through a situation. When you model this for them, they learn how to befriend emotions rather than be at war with them. They will feel safe to have their feelings.
When you are able to be there for yourself, you will have the inner spaciousness to be a witness for your children’s feelings. Not only that, you will not look to your children to meet your needs.
Give yourself and your children a priceless gift – the permission and freedom to embody being perfectly imperfect.
Wendy Silvers helps moms and spiritual seekers awaken their sovereign feminine power, cultivate inner peace, parent confidently, and prosper as healing change agents. Nicknamed Mama Wendy by her clients, she is known for her visionary dedication, fierce advocacy, and intuitive wisdom. A sought after Spiritual Life Coach and Mama Wisdom Counselor, Speaker and Teacher, Wendy is the founder of the Million Mamas Movement, and a published co-author of the International bestselling book, Balance for Busy Moms.
Contact Wendy: firstname.lastname@example.org